In these days of contoured Kardashian t*ts out athleisure for women, contrasted with a coyly conservative tendency for males to go swimming with great big baggy down to the knee things (which apart from looking horrific cannot be comfortable or practical to swim in) - both trends which have swept onto our more stylish European shores from the United States of Bad Taste - it strikes me that we are all ill served by clothing that needs to be simple, comfortable, practical and attractive.

I myself favour these - plain, white, classic, thick enough to keep cover when wet, no ties and buckles and bared midriffs and all the extra elastic that goes with that, no cheesewire, no logos or garish patterns. I have quite a few of these, all the same, because I wear almost nothing else - and you can hardly find them anywhere...



This is a thread for us all to view and debate the strange Lolita world of swimwear and the near impossibility of finding comfortable and serviceable tracksuits that skim without squeezing, last more than two washes, haven't been designed with the wh*rehouse (for women) or a Southern Baptist retreat (for men) in mind, and don't turn you into a walking advert.

Uniqlo do simple and unbranded ones with heat tech, but I can only wear the lower half because the top feels a bit like being in a sauna. I have never owned a bikini - nor do I plan to.

I would love this if it wasn't probably a g-string...

Guaranteed to be much more comfortable without trying to use it like a cheesewire, but a very beautiful swimsuit nevertheless.

They look like they'd retain so much water they'd drag you inexorably under to a watery grave.

I'm a decent swimmer. Also, I never swim in the sea - partly for hygiene reasons and partly because of my submechanophobia - I can't bear the thought of all those spooky silent shipwrecks being in the same body of water as myself. The closest I go is walking through the waves.

The fabric in question happens to be very light, and warm - quick drying. No need to struggle out of waterproof Lycra.

It seems no other swimming fans are here, nor does anyone wear items of athleisure for sport or other purposes.

Looks like a flannel.

I wouldn't know, I've never used one. I have a deep hereditary disgust of flannels and shower curtains. Sometimes you see them draped over someone's sink - it makes me feel sick to think where it might've been along with their face. They look cold and wet and heavy.