I think it’s due to my wisdom teeth removal. On some level I must’ve been trying to get away from the discomfort, in a futile attempt I’ve subconsciously moved the balance of my face away from that side as if it could all escape, and it’s thrown things off kilter.

I feel kind of gloomy and grey, like the weather. And last night I dreamt I was at an AA meeting.

Fangirl Three wrote:

I feel kind of gloomy and grey, like the weather. And last night I dreamt I was at an AA meeting.

Have you been to one?

Yes, I used to go regularly when I didn't drink.

Oh. Didn't work then. I have tried encouraging my mother to go along to a meeting.

Do you think the dream was your subconscious telling you that you miss it? I mean, did the dream feel productive or when you dreaming you were doing something unpleasant almost against your will?

It was interesting, because I had either gone to the meeting inadvertently, or been tricked into it by someone else, I wasn't sure. The predominant feeling was this impression of a mistake.

Quote :

Didn't work then

Well, it did work while I thought (a) abstinence was the only solution and (b) AA was the only way to achieve abstinence.

It will work for anyone who believes both those things, because they (like me then) will be able to put up with the controlling behaviour of some members, the not religious/religious bait and switch, the 1935-style understanding of addiction and the busywork.

Fangirl Three wrote:

It was interesting, because I had either gone to the meeting inadvertently, or been tricked into it by someone else, I wasn't sure. The predominant feeling was this impression of a mistake.

Quote :

Didn't work then

Well, it did work while I thought (a) abstinence was the only solution and (b) AA was the only way to achieve abstinence.

It will work for anyone who believes both those things, because they (like me then) will be able to put up with the controlling behaviour of some members, the not religious/religious bait and switch, the 1935-style understanding of addiction and the busywork.

Yes, ive heard some of this. The evangelism sounds unappealing, and the covert? religiosity is an element I don't get. There must be exposes a go go, but just as attendees don't go into much detail with those of us who don't go, neither do apostates say much. Choose your demon maybe?  Addiction or having to deal with a structure like AA/NA.

The only way i gave up smoking was to say to myself 'I'll have one if I want one'. I've had about four cigarettes this summer. Certainly no more than six, possibly only three, I don't monitor. Saying to myself 'I will never have another' never worked. How long is never? God, the stress of infinity made me rush to buy more just to cope with the thought.

Abstinence is a strange thing isn't it. If you are addicted to something, you know how it goes so staying away from it likely is the only option for staying alive, and/or not derailing your life on the way to an early grave. But how.