Why isn't there one in Sheffield?

They could have it bridging the gap between St Paul's Tower and the Arts Tower.

Admittedly, they're a mile apart but a one-mile-long swimming pool is perfectly feasible.

I've asked a swimming pool engineer.

Anyway, I'd swim in it, provided there were no other people in it.

Other people would distract me.

People I know might be allowed to use it too.

Further research shows those buildings are only ten stories tall.

In what way are they skyscrapers?

An effluvium of scum sloshing about in a slime pool between two hideous pepper-pot 25 floor turds.

A septic glimpse of a London nobody wants to see or acknowledge.

May it all collapse with great loss of life.

I'd swim in it. I might not hang around too long in the middle bit though.

But I do hope that the vibrations from the helicopter were accounted for when building the fragile glass swimming pool.

the Kenneth Williams diaries, June 1 1976 wrote:

An effluvium of scum sloshing about in a slime pool between two hideous pepper-pot 25 floor turds.

A septic glimpse of a London nobody wants to see or acknowledge.

May it all collapse with great loss of life.

I wonder if it collapsed, and I was in it, would the water fall down with me and cushion the impact?

On reflection it's quite Quentin Crispy as well.

I would not. I find it thoroughly offensive as a concept. In a city with such acute housing problems, this moral monstrosity is a slap in the face. It's also just plain f***ing tacky. Hopefully it will meet an appropriately south London fate - a hail of bullets across the bottom of it, to cause serious leakage and irreparable damage to the buildings themselves. Like an enjoyable 9/11 to mark the 20th anniversary.