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Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
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Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
Guest wrote:What kind of pet did Aladdin have?
- Spoiler:
A flying car-pet!
A guinea pig?
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Nightjar- Posts : 104754
Karma : 849
Join date : 2018-05-05
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
I've just realised I didn't get to pull a cracker this year
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Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
Nightjar wrote:Guest wrote:What kind of pet did Aladdin have?
- Spoiler:
A flying car-pet!
A guinea pig?
My guess was ADOGin.
Guest- Guest
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
Why are Christmas Trees so bad at sewing?
What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?
- Spoiler:
They always drop their needles!
What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?
- Spoiler:
Horn aments!
SiberianPrincess’sMidriff- Posts : 42683
Karma : 459
Join date : 2021-07-19
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
Those two were from the Advent calendar, which would explain why they're better than the one from the cracker from last year.
Talking about which, I had a couple left…
What do angry mice send to each other at Christmas?
Talking about which, I had a couple left…
What do angry mice send to each other at Christmas?
- Spoiler:
Cross mouse cards!
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SiberianPrincess’sMidriff- Posts : 42683
Karma : 459
Join date : 2021-07-19
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
What did the grape do when it got trodden on?
- Spoiler:
- It let out a little wine
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Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
I actually got one yesterday that was genuinely funny.
I can't remember what it was though.
I can't remember what it was though.
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Nightjar- Posts : 104754
Karma : 849
Join date : 2018-05-05
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
How do snails keep their shells shiny?
- Spoiler:
They use Snail varnish
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a "couldn't care less, come on life ... amuse me, merchant"
SiberianPrincess’sMidriff- Posts : 42683
Karma : 459
Join date : 2021-07-19
Nightjar- Posts : 104754
Karma : 849
Join date : 2018-05-05
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
I go it wrong. I thought the answer was going to be, "By drinking a slug of..." something or other.
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Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
What do you get if you put a sheep in a sauna?
- Spoiler:
A woolly sweater
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a "couldn't care less, come on life ... amuse me, merchant"
SiberianPrincess’sMidriff- Posts : 42683
Karma : 459
Join date : 2021-07-19
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
The jokes in the crackers my Mum bought for yesterday were absolutely pathetic.
Also, the crackers didn't have toys or things in them, just tiny cards with brain-atrophyingly, dunderheaded trivia puzzles on.
Totally ruined Christmas.
Also, the crackers didn't have toys or things in them, just tiny cards with brain-atrophyingly, dunderheaded trivia puzzles on.
Totally ruined Christmas.
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Nightjar- Posts : 104754
Karma : 849
Join date : 2018-05-05
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
I got a complicated metal puzzle in my cracker, which I couldn't solve.
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Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
Fangirl Three wrote:I got a complicated metal puzzle in my cracker, which I couldn't solve.
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Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
Nightjar wrote:The jokes in the crackers my Mum bought for yesterday were absolutely pathetic.
Also, the crackers didn't have toys or things in them, just tiny cards with brain-atrophyingly, dunderheaded trivia puzzles on.
Totally ruined Christmas.
_________________
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
What do you call just married spiders?
Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory?
- Spoiler:
Newly Webs
Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory?
- Spoiler:
Because he couldn't concentrate
SiberianPrincess’sMidriff- Posts : 42683
Karma : 459
Join date : 2021-07-19
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?
- Spoiler:
Tinsillitis
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SiberianPrincess’sMidriff- Posts : 42683
Karma : 459
Join date : 2021-07-19
Re: Christmas Cracker Joke Thread
Where are average things manufactured?
I think repeating the 'factr' bit in the setup weakens it. Maybe a certain other forum admin wrote this one.
- Spoiler:
- In a satisfactory.
I think repeating the 'factr' bit in the setup weakens it. Maybe a certain other forum admin wrote this one.
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