Maybe it's Butters on one of his drives from Dudley to a mysterious location in the far north of Yorkshire.

I don’t believe Butterfield would smoke, let alone trouble anyone’s peace by doing so. No, this is a married man, wrestling with his pre or post coital conscience.

Bare sirens.

Bear siren?

There's a place near here called Bearsden, but disappointingly it just means 'barley valley' and no bears are to be found.

There's a dead squirrel lying on the path round the side of my house.

It's tail has gone missing but it is otherwise intact.

I am leaving it there, in the assumption that something will come along tonight and eat it.

The Call of the Wendigo wrote:

It's tail has gone missing

Oh I do hope it's found.

Probably on the back of some Mod's scooter.

I am sat in my ex's studio (where her computer is) at the top of her house (third floor) in Walthamstow and I have the window open wide and there're church bells pealing across the ether from very far away.

It is a strange experience.

Pleasant but a bit ghostly.

Atmospheric for certain.

Coming from the direction of Clappy Town perhaps?

Oh, yeah, not my house of course.

I don't know what's going on outside my house.

Your ex is there, listening to the bells of St Smoker's Junction.

Two people on tiny truck things, I think they're the weed sprayers!




Also it's the 1st of the Month, as I had to sign in.

Ohh, yeahr...

SiberianPrincess’sMidriff wrote:

Every Sunday around this time a man parks his car in the semi legal parking spot over the road gets out as has a fag gets back in and drives off again.

Is it a black car?

Did anyone hear ceremonial sirens and gun salutes? I didn’t hear them. Why does Kate Middleton keep wearing hats? She can ditch them now - the queen won’t know.

I heard nothing.

Did nobody else hear anything?

I didn't.

Flat directly opposite now has a floodlight, for unknowable reasons. It’s like a military searchlight for incoming fighter jets or something - I can’t think what else it could be. It goes on and off randomly which is even more disruptive.

Tonight is the second night I’ve had to take cocodamol to stave off the headache that’s formed from being blinded as I look out from my kitchen. My son is sleeping in the living room because his bedroom is basically unusable.

I’m annoyed enough to go over there tonight but I have a feeling that would end in a screaming match. Or possibly begin as one and escalate from there. So I’m going to leave it until daylight and I’ll calmly explain my position.

I haven’t done it yet.

We actually have another newish neighbour who has also altered the tone. This one has a tarts cackle that’s been getting on my nerves all summer.

Why am I cursed with neighbours who make themselves known?