Re: What's happening in your life? Part 2

by cosmictanya Thu Jul 14, 2022 1:32 pm

I'm all about people living their own lives their own way, but I've no idea why anyone would agree to the following set up.

I've spoken before about this friend of mine who got together with a lovely guy, moved into his house, got him to add her name to the deeds, and almost immediately started having sex with someone behind his back.

He's been sleeping in the shed. It's the only place he's allowed to. The dog has the spare room. If she has someone over, he's allowed into the house to watch - but not join in. Afterwards, he goes back out to the shed.

It's his house!

It sounds actively abusive to me, rather than merely being a little niche.

I rang earlier to find out if he could do something for me, and she said he was 'still' in the shed. I asked what she meant, and that was explanation that followed.

by Fangirl Three Thu Jul 14, 2022 2:11 pm

I've no idea why anyone would agree to the following set up

I have - if they wanted a lifestyle DS relationship, with added 'cucking'. asp

by cosmictanya Thu Jul 14, 2022 2:34 pm

by Fangirl Three Thu Jul 14, 2022 3:24 pm

Dom/sub

by cosmictanya Thu Jul 14, 2022 4:25 pm

Ah. I thought maybe 'Domestic Servitude/Slavery'. Well, fair enough if he's fully consenting, but I couldn't be confident of that. She's treated him like trash and spoken of him as a spare part and a complete joke since she moved in with him.

We were friends, but I ended up getting on better with him than her which she didn't like. Before I met him it didn't greatly phase me. I thought her plans to sort herself out financially by hooking up with a gullible idiot were only semi serious.

While I'm sure there are genuine dom/sub relationships out there, I have personally never encountered one. I've known a handful of couples who are open about having such arrangements, and without exception I'd class them as abusive.

It always seems to be the stronger person stamping their needs and wishes all over someone 'weaker' who suffers for it - the opposite of what I understand the theory of that dom/sub dynamic to be - a consensual, discreet power balance.

It's like the 'I didn't mean to kill her, she just really loved being strangled during sex and I didn't realize I'd killed her until she was dead' defence. Namely, total b*llshit in almost every case, and semi respectable code for simply abusing someone.

by cosmictanya Mon Jul 25, 2022 9:56 pm

Scenes of 'poor me' earlier, due to my having pulled the second half of my sons summer. Nobody likes a spoilt brat, so I think it's too indulgent for a teenager to be fully funded and sent off on a month long Polynesian jolly.

Instead, he'll be spending a week in Scotland - for which the train is booked - followed by a week or so in suburbia helping his uncle decorate his new house. The rest of his time is free to kick around town, find a festival to go to (or not), pay for his own day trips, etc.

I might take him for a weekend somewhere in Europe at the end of August.

by cosmictanya Sun Jul 31, 2022 7:53 pm

I want to go to bed now, but I have to stay up to see how my solar spotlights and new solar fairy lights all work together.

by Fangirl Three Mon Aug 01, 2022 3:01 pm

I was all ready to pre-empt Nightjar from doing his 'first of the month' thing.

But I've forgotten what thread he does it in bawl

by cosmictanya Tue Aug 02, 2022 3:50 pm

There was a barbecue over the weekend in Chiswick, which I didn't go to because I don't like barbecues and my mother's boyfriend was going. It seems he still has issues with me, because my brother reported to me that this f*ckwit said to my son 'I don't envy you mate, having a handful like that for a mother must be hell'.

And my son replied calmly and with apparent sincerity, 'Everyone envies me because I have the best mum in the world', before walking off.

Isn't that nice? I didn't hear anything about any of this until my brother told me about it all on the phone this afternoon.

by SiberianPrincess’sMidriff Wed Aug 03, 2022 10:32 am

I found a strawberry that looks like my little canary

What's happening in your life? Part 2 - Page 43 Scree569

Spoiler:

by **The Call of the Wendigo** Wed Aug 03, 2022 11:13 am

by cosmictanya Sun Aug 07, 2022 5:48 pm

Beautiful afternoon. I thought I'd visit my mother, with lilies. He's there - he opened the door, took the flowers wordlessly and threw them on the floor. She's in her bed - watching some crazed hatemonger with a Meghan Markle obsession - I could hear it blaring as I got closer to the door.

I said 'why aren't you outside, it's a beautiful day, are you ill or something?'. To which she replied 'oh just f*** off and stop causing trouble'. He's watching some recorded rugby tournament with all the windows firmly closed. She'll no doubt get up shortly to make and serve him dinner.

They almost deserve each other.

by Nightjar Sun Aug 07, 2022 7:42 pm

cosmictanya wrote:Beautiful afternoon. I thought I'd visit my mother, with lilies.

White ones?

by cosmictanya Sun Aug 07, 2022 7:46 pm

Nightjar wrote:
cosmictanya wrote:Beautiful afternoon. I thought I'd visit my mother, with lilies.

White ones?

Yes, white ones. Yes, I know that the older generations still see them as funeral flowers or omens of death - my grandmother wouldn't have white lilies in the house, and once binned some she found in mine in case people wrongly assumed I was in mourning. My mother and I have always loved them.

by Nightjar Sun Aug 07, 2022 7:58 pm

I like lilies for how they look all nice, but I always associate them with being at my Mum's and sitting (where I usually sit) and there being a big vaseful of them on a shelf in a nook just behind my shoulder to the right and the sweetly acrid, musty smell insidiously creeping into my nostrils all awhile that I'm only faintly aware of it.

It's a smell that creeps into my consciousness and general mood and makes me feel all ill at ease.

Also, a couple of times, when my Mum's let them stand a bit too long, I've managed to inadvertently get some of the pollen on a shirt sleeve when I've got up.

And, well, that sh*t don't wash out.

It's Tarka ~~the Otter~~ Daal down the front of a raw silk shirt stainy. bawl

by cosmictanya Sun Aug 07, 2022 8:13 pm

Nightjar wrote:I like lilies for how they look all nice, but I always associate them with being at my Mum's and sitting (where I usually sit) and there being a big vaseful of them on a shelf in a nook just behind my shoulder to the right and the sweetly acrid, musty smell insidiously creeping into my nostrils all awhile that I'm only faintly aware of it.

It's a smell that creeps into my consciousness and general mood and makes me feel all ill at ease.

Also, a couple of times, when my Mum's let them stand a bit too long, I've managed to inadvertently get some of the pollen on a shirt sleeve when I've got up.

And, well, that sh*t don't wash out.

It's Tarka ~~the Otter~~ Daal down the front of a raw silk shirt stainy.

Yes, they do stain very badly. However they look good and I like the scent. I have to be careful because I once handwrote (as we did in the 20th century) a school essay next to a vase of lilies and, having sat next to them for about four hours, had one of the worst nosebleeds of my life. I had to hand it in with an apology for the splatter/wipe marks affecting pages 5 and 6.

It was lucky I was just finishing it off when the first drop of blood landed, followed by a couple more, allowing me to move my head as the flood began. I never had many nosebleeds, maybe only five or six, but when I did they were like nothing else in the world and were accompanied by a very specific type of headache I can't fully describe - a great and sudden heaviness.

There's a scene on Six Feet Under where a woman gets the kind of nosebleed I used occasionally to get, the same sudden onset headache and full fountain. She drops dead there and then. It's always been one of my worst fears. As far as I can make out, they have two causes with me - the approach of very muggy, thundery weather, and sitting next to a vase of lilies for four hours.

by cosmictanya Mon Aug 08, 2022 1:17 pm

I spoke to my brother about this boyfriend of our mothers. She listens to him. She's just rung - drunk - and said she's now considering getting rid of the guy. I'm absolutely horrified.

My brother has gone too far. This is a 70 year old childless only child with some kind of undiagnosed COPD, a possible hint of cancer, and old rugby injuries, who owns three properties outright.

I didn't mean she should dump him FGS. Just take him in hand, and make it clear that I'll have nothing to do with him until the obligatory sad hospice visit to check his morphine driver.

by cosmictanya Mon Aug 08, 2022 2:36 pm

Immediate panic over. I've talked her down from the edge. It seems he's not pleased with her because she landed in a piece of his topiary at a rugby barbecue, and now it's imprinted with the shape of an ar*e, two thighs, and a flailing arm. Apparently he didn't even help her up. That's him all over.

by cosmictanya Mon Aug 08, 2022 4:14 pm

My favourite great aunt was always castigated for saying (admittedly repeatedly and indiscretely) that she'd aborted the wrong pregnancy, but more evidence she was correct has been received.

This unloved person has boasted today all over email about some financial win - I've received the round robin myself, naming the exact amount she's looking forward to receiving and spending.

My mother received a personalized one titled 'Haven't you heard yet?'. This woman has teeth like Ken Dodd. My great aunt always said she was such an ugly girl anyway that an orthodontist would be a waste of everyone's time.

I recall her at a party when I was about 14, when my brother said 'nice shoes' sarcastically, and she replied 'I simply had to have them, they're so elegant'. Hideous maroon satin things with diamanté ankle straps.

She must've got her thick ankles from her father - everyone else of our blood has very defined ankles. He died of bleeding piles, which my grandparents found absolutely hilarious. I rather liked him. A kind man.

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