What's happening in your life?

Such a nice day. It was one of my four annual scale and polishings at the dentist. On recommendation I began seeing a Brazilian dentist in W1. I was apprehensive at first because I've never had a gentile dentist, but after a rocky start a few months ago I've become appreciative of his craftsmanship and less offended by his dismissive bedside manner.

A successful series of meetings rounded off a great day. Then, I met my mother for an early dinner. Normally I don't eat before nine, which is a custom I should've stuck to. We actually had a lovely time until she came back from the loo, where she was offered and evidently hoovered up a very different type of South American product.

Fine, but it makes her even more vicious than normal, and she had already downed three triple vodkas. Within no time at all, literally from nowhere, she was snarling and screaming a volley of some of the most disgusting things anyone has ever said to me.

We were asked to leave the premises, at which point she pulled the tablecloth out from under everything. The screaming became worse as we made our way through the disapproval of other diners to the outside.

They were in such a rush for us to leave immediately that they said it wasn't going to be necessary to pay. It's only because I'm a very fast walker that I managed to outpace her as she tried to follow me down the street for round two.

I'm babysitting. Sean's daughter asked if she could spend the day with me. I took her over to my storage facility (for excess clothes and shoes) and allowed her to fill a bin liner with stuff. I think that was really kind of me. We did have a disagreement over a pair of Rene Caovilla shoes she liked, which I've no intention of giving anyone.

She's down on the landings playing with a neighbours pug. I think we'll have lemon roulade with fresh raspberries soon. I hope he gets here soonish because I don't know how to amuse her all evening. I've had about enough waking time for one week and am looking forward to a g&t and a couple of tranqs.

I did offer to take her to the hairdresser - she's got that very dark hair that Irish descent can bestow. I thought she might enjoy a smoothing treatment and a cut. Her mother ruled that out because it's their activity. Fair enough.

Her mothers hair is the style and probable texture of bleached white candy floss. Not sure if I've mentioned this before. I wouldn't mind taking her to my salon to get it fixed. A buzz cut and a couple of years of nothing but shampoo and conditioner as it grows in should sort it. And whoever did her t*ts should be struck off.

On my own hair problems, previously described, we've decided that a golden tone should disguise the grays for now. I don't have the colouring for silver - I insisted years ago and they did it. It looked dreadful and the purple shampoo wrecked two of my favourite Hermes towels.

My son no longer allows me to have his own hair highlighted and we've all been surprised at how dark it's become. The upper edge of dirty blonde. Almost brown. Getting used to a virtually brunette child has been a journey, as they say.

Maybe we should have a hair thread to discuss all of our own hits, hints, tips, worries and outright catastrophes.

I can't believe she's done this. At breakfast (Turks and Caicos time) my son rang to say his grandmother was nowhere to be found. He called again an hour ago to say she'd left a note saying she wasn't feeling well and was going to Miami.

And so she's there. After ringing various hospitals, airlines and consulates, I've just spoken to her. She's in a waiting room at a nuthouse clinic, trying to check herself in. She's left him alone in the Caribbean.

My brother is in a meeting, but he's a social worker so I want to speak to him first. I don't know what to do. I rang him to say relax, sit by the pool. I rang the hotel back to say everything is fine, any spending on that account charge it to me.

How could she do this. I'm going out of my mind, and everybody is at work.

I feel quite faint. This facility she's taken herself to has one and a half stars, and evidently a litany of suicides connected to it. She's left him on his own in a foreign country in a different time zone.

Good news in the firm of a sensible solution. My uncle is at his house in Bermuda, so he's going via Miami to Providenciales. At the weekend they can then go together to his apartment in New York. New York was in the planned itinerary anyway. Good. Not a wholesale change, just a slight rearrangement.

That should negate the need for outside involvement. I've rung to say don't dare leave the hotel complex until my uncle arrives. That's quite satisfactory. As to her, I really don't know what to say. It seems there is no emotional speedbump that can't be turned into Mount Everest.

Lunchtime or thereabouts there so I've rung to say, you know - don't go in the pool for an hour and a half after the last mouthful, sunscreen, don't leave the premises, stay away from the minibar. In two minds as to whether to call the reception to get the minibar cleared out. I'll probably have to stay up all night to check in from time to time.

As to my mother, I think we'll find her an employment lawyer to see what can be done about her employer taking no action on her health.

We've been dead against her retiring on the grounds that once retired, she'll have nothing to stop her drinking every day.

If she can be signed off for a period of time at their expense, to test how she gets on without work, that's probably as ideal as it gets.

Why she took herself off in a panic to the United States is telling in itself. I can't imagine a worse developed country to have a breakdown in.

What a worry for you. However, you did manage to sort out a solution inside 90 minutes, which is impressive given that it's all happening 4000 miles away.

I am nothing if not resourceful after momentary panic. It seems to be how I'm built.

My uncle will be arriving there today and the holiday can resume with a different overseer who has different standards (he hates children and teenagers as much as my mother loves them). His partner is going to Miami (and that's ideal because she loves him) to fetch and take her to their house in Bermuda for TLC, and we'll find her somewhere over here if that's what she needs. Surely she can now see that all this alcohol is a hindrance to making decisions and compels others to sleepless compromise.

I'm so relieved everything has gone according to hastily made plans today. It could've all been so terrible in so many ways, and it usually is. I was having visions of policing, immigration, social and mental health services having to coordinate across three countries on two continents. Now all reduced to a brief storm on a sunny holiday.

Fangirl Three wrote:I have been scanned. It was a bit undignified but I coped.

It's so complicated going for tests and scans and probes, it's all 'please go into this cubicle and take X off and then put Y back on, then wait till we call you'

The results of my scan came today. I am clear of any problems

Just moving the cars round on the drive so I can get out for work tomorrow and a rather nice lady walked in and asked me for directions, she was from Denmark and wanted Shakespeare rd, so I got maps up on my phone and showed her (It's not far)

I suppose I should have given her a lift

I often see the end of Shakespeare Rd as I drive along Church Lane, one of our beloved town's most useful roads when it comes to traffic dodging.

Yes it is very useful, and quite unspoilt.