It's all gone too dance-orientated for a woman with a taste for black leather and golf.

This is tripe.

Armenia up next.

Have to put Eurovision on hold while I bring my washing in.

You just don't get running commentary like this elsewhere do you?

I'm back. Did I miss anything?

Mr. Wiggles wrote:

You just don't get running commentary like this elsewhere do you?

It's why we're still Number One among the core demographic.

Anyway. I'm back. I hope I didn't miss anything.

Armenia.

Hold on. Weren't they on before I went out to bring my washing in? How long is this song?

Rubbishy beardy man.

He's singing in Armenian but it's obvious the lyrics are very repetitive.

Just 59 minutes to go.

This is very unoutstanding.

It's competent but doesn't have that spark.

Even his big long note isn't high-pitched. You won't win Eurovision these days if you can't go high-pitched.

Switzerland next.

This looks promising.

And now it's lost its momentum.

And now it's got it back again.

It keeps being on the brink of having what it takes but then loses it.

She's trying to get the crowd going but its all too contrived for me.

Babycakesland is  on next.